I'm No Businessman
A lot of things motivate me, but I have a hard time getting into salesmanship. This not a strength of mine. Maybe I could learn. I dunno.
I can write a serious letter if I have to. I've applied for my bands to play several festivals. I even wrote to a lawyer once, but that's about the extent of my confidence in this area.
These things come to mind as BB gets closer and closer to going on tour. When there's talk of grant proposals and out-of-town promotions I feel a bit out of my depth. I realize though that this is what it takes for a band to "get to the next level". Prior to my two most recent bands, these issues just never came up. "Old Band" couldn't tour because of conflicting work and school commitments. No other band I've been in ever seriously considered playing outside the region. I felt lucky to be in a band at all. That was enough for me.
What I did not realize then (but do now) is that "just being in a band" is fucking easy. Any trip to Rflctns on a Monday night confirms this. I think bands reach a point where they have to decide if what they do is for fun only or whether it's more important than that.
Over the past 17 years I've been in tons of "fun" bands who lived out the dream of playing local shows. That used to seem like such a big deal. Back then I used to have mixed feelings about bands from around here who went off on ambitious tours. "Well, aren't you right some grand and fancy. I guess this part of the world just isn't good enough for Mr. Fancypants and his precious Art". I never admitted that to anyone, but it was in the back of my mind. How dare anyone be so pretentious as to want to see the world??
Living out west was a huge eye opener for me. Most things I believed about music (and life) had changed 180 degrees by the time I came home in 2000. One thing I came to realize was that there's a lot of conservatism in music scenes, and I was as guilty as anyone. I had to look at myself and decide if that's who I really was. Same old music. Same faces in the same crowd. True til death. Never sell out.
I came to the conclusion that I didn't get into punk rock to act like a reactionary.
"You say you're different, I'm not convinced.
You've acted the same ever since......
Rebellion to you must only be a look, because the way you think is just like everyone else.
You won't let anyone change you, but you won't change yourself.
Can't you see what's going on? You'll soon end up like all the people you hate - your parents, your former friends......
I see you sit around and rot. You think you're still a kid, but you're not.
You tell me you've tried. I know it's just a lie. Now all you've got left to do is fucking die.
For all your big talk, you haven't done shit."
When I wrote those words in 1996, I had inadvertently described myself (except for the hating part... I don't hate my parents, or my former friends). It took a few years, but this sunk in and it changed the way I look at being in a band. This is why I never want any of my bands to sound identical to the last (or even close, preferably). This is why I laugh at the thought of reunions. It's why I think a band has to leave no stone unturned in realizing their full potential. That means experimenting with music and presentation, touring ambitiously, or both.
Unfortunately, this epiphany shed light on some flaws I never knew I had, which brings us back to the beginning part of this post. Living in a world/scene where all I had to do was write songs, play around town, put out my own bands' demos in 50-copy runs and book the odd out-of-town show... this was great, because I'm pretty good at things like that. Now that the stakes are higher though, I feel like I'm struggling to keep up. I'm not really good at shaking hands and kissing babies all over the country/world. Constructing business plans, promotion... this is what it takes to realize potential. I'm glad I have friends around me who thrive on these things, or at least are up to the challenge.
Maybe I'll get there too at some point. I've been a late bloomer/slow grower in virtually every area of my life. Not that I'm complaining. I'm doing things at (almost-) 35 that most people do at 20. So I guess I'll count my blessings and go write some more fucked up punk rock songs.
I can write a serious letter if I have to. I've applied for my bands to play several festivals. I even wrote to a lawyer once, but that's about the extent of my confidence in this area.
These things come to mind as BB gets closer and closer to going on tour. When there's talk of grant proposals and out-of-town promotions I feel a bit out of my depth. I realize though that this is what it takes for a band to "get to the next level". Prior to my two most recent bands, these issues just never came up. "Old Band" couldn't tour because of conflicting work and school commitments. No other band I've been in ever seriously considered playing outside the region. I felt lucky to be in a band at all. That was enough for me.
What I did not realize then (but do now) is that "just being in a band" is fucking easy. Any trip to Rflctns on a Monday night confirms this. I think bands reach a point where they have to decide if what they do is for fun only or whether it's more important than that.
Over the past 17 years I've been in tons of "fun" bands who lived out the dream of playing local shows. That used to seem like such a big deal. Back then I used to have mixed feelings about bands from around here who went off on ambitious tours. "Well, aren't you right some grand and fancy. I guess this part of the world just isn't good enough for Mr. Fancypants and his precious Art". I never admitted that to anyone, but it was in the back of my mind. How dare anyone be so pretentious as to want to see the world??
Living out west was a huge eye opener for me. Most things I believed about music (and life) had changed 180 degrees by the time I came home in 2000. One thing I came to realize was that there's a lot of conservatism in music scenes, and I was as guilty as anyone. I had to look at myself and decide if that's who I really was. Same old music. Same faces in the same crowd. True til death. Never sell out.
I came to the conclusion that I didn't get into punk rock to act like a reactionary.
"You say you're different, I'm not convinced.
You've acted the same ever since......
Rebellion to you must only be a look, because the way you think is just like everyone else.
You won't let anyone change you, but you won't change yourself.
Can't you see what's going on? You'll soon end up like all the people you hate - your parents, your former friends......
I see you sit around and rot. You think you're still a kid, but you're not.
You tell me you've tried. I know it's just a lie. Now all you've got left to do is fucking die.
For all your big talk, you haven't done shit."
When I wrote those words in 1996, I had inadvertently described myself (except for the hating part... I don't hate my parents, or my former friends). It took a few years, but this sunk in and it changed the way I look at being in a band. This is why I never want any of my bands to sound identical to the last (or even close, preferably). This is why I laugh at the thought of reunions. It's why I think a band has to leave no stone unturned in realizing their full potential. That means experimenting with music and presentation, touring ambitiously, or both.
Unfortunately, this epiphany shed light on some flaws I never knew I had, which brings us back to the beginning part of this post. Living in a world/scene where all I had to do was write songs, play around town, put out my own bands' demos in 50-copy runs and book the odd out-of-town show... this was great, because I'm pretty good at things like that. Now that the stakes are higher though, I feel like I'm struggling to keep up. I'm not really good at shaking hands and kissing babies all over the country/world. Constructing business plans, promotion... this is what it takes to realize potential. I'm glad I have friends around me who thrive on these things, or at least are up to the challenge.
Maybe I'll get there too at some point. I've been a late bloomer/slow grower in virtually every area of my life. Not that I'm complaining. I'm doing things at (almost-) 35 that most people do at 20. So I guess I'll count my blessings and go write some more fucked up punk rock songs.
posted by the baron ash von foolishness at 5:02 PM
3 Comments:
Halifax can be a hard place to be for people with talent and vision. It's like putting Mozart in a class with a bunch of burn-outs and pregnant fourteen year-olds who smoke.
You're right about being in a band not being exceptional in itself. For a lot of people, being in a band is just another boring accessory. It's a part of their uniform, like the typical patches on their denim jackets.
I agree, especially with the first paragraph. Well said.
Everything in this entry could have come out of my own mouth. I related with everything you said. Good to know I'm not alone!
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